Let’s take awebsite3 painful little stroll down Despair Lane, shall we Borrelia?

I was diagnosed with Lyme disease in November of 2010 after two years of symptoms. Until then, I felt crazy and I felt like I was dying. I felt like no one could understand my terror and that no one really wanted to help. I felt abandoned by a medical community that, purposely or not, turned their backs to me.

My muscles twitched constantly.My hands and feet buzzed and vibrated, like cell phones were going off inside of them. My hands and feet also constantly “fell asleep” and the sensation of pins and needles was unusually frequent.  Electric shocks surged through my arms and legs. It felt like I was short-circuiting. I felt dizzy and off  balance. Sometimes, the whole room would suddenly tilt and I would literally fall off of my chair. My ears were ringing and I had ear and jaw pain.  I had stabbing pains in the back of my head and behind my eye. I also had lots of “floaters” and saw double images. At times, it felt like ants were crawling under my skin. At other times, it felt like warm water was running down my legs.  Impossibly heavy menstrual cycles became impossibly heavier. I was forgetful and absentminded. I experienced crushing fatigue. My back was in agonizing pain.  My bladder was inflamed.  I went from never having sinus infections to always having sinus infections. Panic attacks consumed me.

I visited specialist after specialist chasing my symptoms, including a urologist, optometrist, OB/GYN, chiropractor, dermatologist and neurologist. I ended up in the ER twice. I had MRIs, CAT scans, chest x-rays, EKGs, ultrasounds, biopsies, blood tests and more blood tests. Celiac disease, diabetes, Multiple Sclerosis, a brain tumor and uterine cancer were among the things that were ruled out. “Nothing” was wrong was all I heard. One doctor told me I was just a stressed-out working mom and to just go home and relax.

Then, I landed in the office of my Lyme literate Naturopathic doctor, though I didn’t know she was Lyme literate at the time. I told her the reason for my visit was that I was literally falling apart because there seemed to be something wrong with every part of me. I had lost twenty pounds, feared my kids were going to lose their mother, and was considering a medical leave of absence from work. Before she started trying to remedy all the different things that were wrong with me, she did two things. First, she listened. Second, she tested me for Lyme disease.

It was Lyme disease. She was right. I was too physically and emotionally drained to dwell on how so many doctors had failed me until then. I put all of my energy into following her ever evolving treatment plans of antibiotics, herbs, tinctures, probiotics and more. She dared to care for me and I love her for it.

I also developed my own form of therapy shortly thereafter. I would talk or “whisper” to “Borrelia” in my head. Borrelia, is the spirochete, or spiral-shaped bacteria, that causes Lyme disease. I awoke one morning and angrily scolded “her” (Borrelia). I insisted that she was not going to keep me from accomplishing anything. I defied Borrelia that morning by verbally taking the upper hand, and I’ve been “whispering” to her ever since.

That is how the Lyme Whisperer came to be. I began to chronicle my thoughts and conversations aimed at Borrelia, as I pushed forward in my journey. My blog lymewhisperer.com was created as a result.

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